my slightly off life

I can't feel my legs, I HAVE NO LEGS!

Fate works in really fucked up ways sometimes

this so isnt my week first my brother gets called to war or whatever and now my mom is getting married a full 4 months earlier than i expected. i mean i knew she was gonna get married but i didnt expect it to be this soon. i thought that the four month period would give me time to adapt but nope! im stuck here just crying because im moving! no more walks with annie after school, no more card shop self esteem trips, no more just wandering after school for no reason because im gonna be stuck in conneut lake with nothing to do. and what's worse is, i was thinking this summer i could hang out with annie more, i mean i had expected to move in the summer but i really didnt expect it. i feel so selfish my mom (who is finally happy) feels guilty and idont want her to! i mean she's finally happy and now my brothers going away and she's getting MARRIED! i mean that's a big step! and i just dont want to move! i mean that is selfish it's as selfish as one can get at a time like this but i just feel this way. i mean yeah kids move every year and they change schools im not even changing my school im staying in school in meadville and all. man i felt like crap today in rehersal! i just did i mean i got fliped the bird to some guy i was just having fun with, my friends werent there (well not close ones at least) and i just didnt feel good about everything about my brother about what was gonna happen to him and all and then when i got in the car, my mom dropped it outta no where, "cassie" she said "im getting married next week" and immediately i was like what? no! i dont want to move! i know totally selfish! grr i just needed to write this thanks for listening/reading

Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

It's only after you've lost everything that you're free to do anything.

When you have insomnia, you're never really asleep... and you're never really awake

camp anawanna, we hold you in our hearts, and when we think about you, it makes me wanna FART!

Bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are.

I didn't jump to conclusions. I took a small step, and conclusions were there

we are born inocent believe me adia we are still inocent it's easy we are faltered...does it matter?
yeah sorry i cant spell
im sitting here in my kitchen and it's so weird my brother got called yesterday. he's going to war. it's strange how nothings changed but really everything has. im was sitting in my room last night trying to tell my self dont be stupid he'll come back he'll be fine, but at the same time i was crying my eyes out worrying about losing him. which i really odd because chuck (that's his name) and i were never that close he's 6 years older than me so we never had those sort of bonding moments he graduated when i was in 6th grade and i didnt even go to his graduation, or my brother bryon's for that matter. he's in college now, he's studing to be a history teacher and im so worried that he isnt coming back. what happens then? do i just go on? what do i say when people ask me how many brothers do i have? do i say i have three but one of them died? or do i just say i have 2? i guess i shouldnt be thinking about these things, i mean he hasnt left yet i shouldnt be worrying about it not now! why god! i mean my life was going fine! with the occasional teen drama of oh-he-doesnt-like me and the oh-he-likes-me-too-much and of course the im-failing-my-classes but now..i have to worry about how my mom's gonna handle this how im gonna handle it how im gonna go to school everyday wondering if my brother was shot, and if he's never coming back. just thinking about him going makes me cry. why! all i want is to know why?! why are we going to war? why now? whatever happened to world peace?! what happened? im going off on a rampage now! ahh sorry this has been really emotional well at least to me so im just gonna sign this off now

Don't you ever wonder where this is going, where we are exactly? I mean, is this just the first act or is our story ended and we're just too stupid to realize it?

Do you really love me though? Because I'm 15 years old and I go through every day of my life thinking that nobody loves me.

I'm the girl guys are friends with, not the girl guys date.

and i like it like that

Krispy Kreme Donuts wedding cakes are becoming the hot, new thing at weddings this season. Not coincidentally, so are Size 27 wedding dresses

I miss dinosaurs. Let's do something about that.

Blind people think they're so cool.

I HATE SCHOOL I CANT EVEN VIEW MY WEBSITE!!!! GRRR...I CAN POST BUT I CANT VIEW IT! IS THAT SCREWY TO ANYONE ELSE WHY AM I STILL WRITTING IN CAPS? there thats better! yay!

hi yell! dude im in school right now computer yay! yeah..right. it's 2:59. i was wondering something i wonder if a baby could eat another baby i asked some people that and some people just thought i was this crazy weirdo but then some were like well how old are the babies? do they have teeth? then i said i was thinking about a 2 year old eating a 3 month old because they really wouldnt be able to fight back. so adam answered me by saying any mother that leaves a 3-month-old baby alone and it gets eaten she gets what she deserves. then nate said i think so but you would have to force it to eat it because a baby would just eat another baby without haveing someone forcing it to because they dont have good teeth. so yeah my friends are too smart and think too logically about that but yeah. again last night i walked home with adam and nate and basically the conversation consisted of me not turning into a lesbian, nate and gay men, adam not being able to listen to dashboard because he wasnt in a good mood, how im a narcisist because i think everyone loves me, about my boyfriends and how i should have them checked for stds, and nate impersonation a punk drum and then an emo drum. good times, good times.

consider the moment the time and place right now, for once in my life i think ive got things figured out

sorry had a sudden twirpse outburst there

just what's so wrong with holding on? JUST. WHAT'S SO WRONG?! so many words that never left my lips dreams dropping on fingertips

damn it! that was GI that time im just so bored ooh yay! 6 minutes! whoo hoo! yeah annie and i are going to the card shop after school which is good because all the guys fawn over us because we are like the only girls that ever go in there. it's a great self-esteem builder you have a bad day, go to the card shop and feel so cool! yeah okay i find the good in everything